‘No’ Can Be a Very Sexy Word!

Happy new week my friends!

I hope that you are all doing splendidly.  Before I dive into this week’s topic, I just wanted to take a moment to say THANK YOU for all the kind words and support you all showed me on my last post updating you on my results both emotionally and physically from my 3 month health & wellness journey.  If I in some way was able to inspire you to put health & wellness on your radar and a priority for yourselves, then I am completely humbled and grateful to have you all in my little circle of peers and people that I love and care about.  I have to say, helping others is so rewarding for me.  I think that is probably the only thing I miss from working in the hospitality industry, I genuinely cared about each and every customer or ‘friend’ that I encountered in my 20 odd years of working in restaurants.  That connection and knowing that for a brief encounter I was able to bring some kind of joy or a pleasant experience to each of them, I will never forget or take for granted.  Now onto today’s topic!

say-no

What do I mean when I write, ‘No’ can be a very sexy word, you are all probably wondering (I know, I know, flawless and seamless segue :P)

Well let me explain, as some of you already know or if you read my last blog post, I have begun yoga teacher certification training with Yoga Truly.  I have been participating in the practice of yoga on and off for many years now.  The opportunity to take teacher training came up and something inside of me said ‘Yes, this is the right time to make this new step in your journey of self discovery and revelation’. One of the principles that I have really been connecting with is the notion of being truly present and in the moment.  This practice forces you to clear your mind of all the ‘noise’ of our busy and stressful lives and just BE in the the present moment.  In these quiet moments of self refection I have noticed a few things about me and where I am at this moment as a woman and as a entrepreneur.

  • I have a very chatty mind.  No really, sometimes it feels like a disobedient toddler who doesn’t want to go outside and is arguing with everything you tell them to do.
  • When I think I am still and relaxed, actually my neck and shoulders are still clenched and I need to truly be present and thoughtfully release the tension
  • When I am truly in the moment, I have this uncanny ability to achieve an overall feeling of inner peace and joy as I notice all of the simple beauty we have all around us in people, places and nature.
  • With my heightened sense of being aware I have realized that others may not be there yet, and it is OK to say No to them or things they are asking of me if it is not aligned with who I am and where I am aiming to go and this includes potential and current clients.

Yes you heard me correctly, IT IS OK TO SAY NO TO YOUR CLIENTS!

We as women really do struggle with this one. We generally put others before our own needs and think that is how things are supposed to be, almost playing it like we are martyrs and people pleasers, and this can leak into how we relate to our own clients as well.  The late night emails, calls, working overtime but never billing for it, losing sleep and putting your wants and needs on the back burner and so on and so on.

But, who is this really serving?

If you burn the candle at both ends, how is this going to serve others in the long run?

Setting up boundaries with your clients and loved ones right from the get go is not cruel, but essential for a mutually beneficial relationship for both of you.

When you meet with you client, lay it out what you are willing and not willing to accept right from the get go and that includes your fees.  Obviously, do it in a constructive and positive manner, but if they do not agree and fight you on it, then you simply must tell them No and internally say next and let them go, as they are just not ready to accept all that you can offer them or acknowledge the value you have or can add to them and their business.

I have been dealing with the latter lately and this has been a big realization for me as the issue of my fees has come up quite frequently when I discuss what I do with potential clients.  Knowing my talents and what my worth is as a social media manager has been a journey all on its own, but seeing first hand the results I have been able to achieve for my clients has more than validated my talent and expertise.  So here I sit saying NO to lowering my fees and feeling confident that I am making the right choice as I am opening myself up to my ‘ideal client’ who gets what I do, what I offer and recognizes my worth and the value I can offer to them and to their business.

You know what, instead of feeling stressed I feel relieved.  Knowing who you are and what you want as a biz owner is crucial to your success.  Taking any and all clients that may not suit who you are and what you do, does not serve you or your client.  I truly believe that having the courage to say no and turning a client away that did not align with me and my business values is the best thing I can do.

Who knows who the universe will send my way next, but what I do know I will be ready to say Yes or No and be confident in my decision either way.

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I would love to know, do you find it difficult to say No? Why?  I would love to hear.  Please leave your answers in the comments below. 🙂

Thank you again for reading my weekly ramblings and I always appreciate your feedback or comments!

Until we meet again,

Love & Light Always,

Dina xxoo

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4 thoughts on “‘No’ Can Be a Very Sexy Word!

  1. Amen sista!! I opened my business just over a year ago, and one of the hardest things to learn, well, the one that seems to be taking the longest, is the ability to say NO! I set the rules and expect people to follow them, but alas, there’s always that one (or more) person who insists on bending them. The result is me feeling bad about it all, and always giving in to whatever the request may be. It leaves me feeling blah. I HATE feeling like the bad guy lol. I’ve connected with an amazing business coach recently, and she is helping me to move past this. Your blog was great reinforcement!! Thank you Dina!

    Lindsay O’Neil

    Like

    • Thank you Lindsay for your wonderful comment! It really is a journey isn’t it. We all hate feeling like the bad gal, but if we give in with one, we start down that slippery slope, ‘ok just for you’ and then they tell their friends and of course that includes what they paid and if they contact you and you say your price they are going to be offended because you gave their referral a lower rate. This especially is true in a small market like Niagara. I think the biggest thing we all need to do is acknowledge our biz worth, of course determine that according to the market you operate in and honour it, not only for our own selves but for the integrity of the industry we operate in. 🙂

      Like

  2. Super SUPER important thing to remember. As a social worker, the pressures to say “yes” to everything are so strong, and when you say no you feel like the outlier. At this point, I’m in a place of the ultimate “no”: leaving a job that doesn’t allow me to stay healthy and balanced! Thank for you for sharing this.

    Alex J Brown
    http://www.ajbrowncreative.com

    Like

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